Posts filed under ‘humor’

I has a flea problem

Hi there, whether or not this is the beginning of a comeback will remain to be seen. I will refrain from any promises, mmmkay? But I feel like writing something, even if it’s just to let you know I’m still alive. But since I’m quite hopelessly inept at this kind of thing and I didn’t want to catch you all off your guards with a super awesome post out of nowhere, I thought I would just start small.

I have a flea problem. This is what it looks like:
Flea bag
I changed those sheets yesterday night, after ‘flea problem’ finished his daily nap on my bed and left some uninvited guests behind. That’s a loft bed, which means you need to climb some stairs to get there. So today, I thought, I’ll make a ‘flea barrier’ to keep the “problem” out of the bed:

flea barrier

Nevermind all the junk. That's not actually part of the 'barrier'

Then I opened the window:

window

Clearly, I had underestimated the ‘problem’. Flea Buffet jumped in through the window, ate his breakfast and went straight for his nap, unhindered by my silly human barriers. “Yooppie, NOOOOOOOOOO!”, I cried, removing the barrier and climbing the latter. It seemed Mr. Flea Spa had gotten the message, as he promptly climbed down the latter and left, clearly offended.

Satisfied with myself for resisting his cunning feline deception, I went about my morning routine. Halfway through checking my email and daily reading, I start to get this uneasy feeling that I am not alone. I only left for a few minutes at a time, surely he wouldn’t go for it a second time. I removed the barrier and checked the loft. Sure enough:I surrender

I gave up. Asshole.

March 17, 2009 at 5:38 pm 11 comments

Dutch lesson

Nah, not really. But you guys want to know the Top 5 funniest dutch words of all time (at least in my mind)? Either because of how they are spelled, pronounced or mispronounced, these crack me up every time.

Wanna guess what they mean? I even translated the context for you to make it easy. Find out after the jump.

#5: burger, as in American burger. Nope, nothing to do with McD’s.

o rly?#4: hoor, as in “Ja, hoor!”. Pronounced wh0re. Ya, rly! Of course it means something else! What did you expect? This is a family blog!

#3: monster, as in “Did you gather any monsters in the field today?”

lucifer, singular#2: lucifers, as in “Have you seen the lucifers? I need a smoke!

#1: ghettoblaster, as in “Turn on the ghettoblaster! Let’s have some fun!!1!

(more…)

March 12, 2008 at 1:45 am 2 comments


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